The Power of Positive Parenting

So...we have now been in Utah for nearly a year (can't believe that! We are still getting used to being here) and in that year our Lucky Dragon has changed so much. He is taller, thinner and looks more like a boy than a toddler now compared to when we arrived. His intellectual skills have grown in leaps and bounds as children do between the ages of 1 and 3.

We have to consciously make a plan on what we are going to work with him during the week to keep him learning new things. He has his colors and shapes down so moved to 3D shapes too. Which he learned quickly. The other day we were coming from the grocery store in the car (it was dark) he kept saying, "Help me find my cylinder! I lost my cylinder!" We could not figure out what he was talking about until we realized he was referring to the Tootsie Roll the cashier had given him...it was true it is a cylinder! Haha.

He also recognizes letters and we try to help him with the alphabet as much as possible. Most of all his communication skills have improved drastically. He picks up things so quickly (we have had to start to watch what we say around him because even if we don't think he is listening he will repeat it). He loves to read and we spend hours with him under the tree in his room reading book after book.

He is an extrovert to the truest sense. He loves people (not sure where it gets that...haha). He will wave to people on the street, say hello to people in the store and ask any child around him if they want to be his friend. It makes my heart happy.

Lady Hiva and I have been learning to be parents too.  It is not a black and white thing, as all of you know. There are frustrating times, fun times, and  the best is when we get hugs and slobbery wet kisses from him. We are constantly trying to help him develop into the best little guy he can be. Whether it is a Family Home Evening lesson about sharing and being kind, or taking time to explain something he is curious about it is fun to see the world through his eyes.

We had someone tell us when we first moved here about positive parenting. (Sounds really granola and yuppy). Positive parenting is cutting out words like don't, can't and other similar chiding words. Kids are constantly learning and want to know where the boundaries are, but if they only hear angry words of what they can't do, they think being negative is the way to work with others.

Now, before, you get worried. This does NOT mean we do not correct him, nor does it mean we are those parents that just let our children run amok either. It means that instead of focusing on what Tau'aho is doing wrong, we focus on what we want him to do instead--focusing on the correct behavior.

As an example, a simple one, if he is eating and spitting his food out. Instead of saying, "Don't spit your food!" We try to say, "Keep your food in your mouth and chew it." Think about it, as a little person all they hear in the first sentence is "...spit your food." So of course, they are confused. With the second sentence they understand that what we really want is for him to keep his food in his mouth.

This is true of any action we are trying to correct. AND IT IS HARD. I didn't realize how much I say don't, stop, no, or can't until now. We are not perfect, neither is he. However, it makes it all positive communication in the house when we reinforce correct behavior and Tau'aho picks up on the correct actions. So we are learning too...but for the time being we all seem to be pretty good friends.

The next challenge is potty training! Sigh...

BYU--Masters of Public Administration

Last week I was asked to do an appearance on BYU's campus and speak to some students getting their Master's of Public Administration. As you all know, I never shy away from being in front of people! It was a panel of three of us, so the only challenge for me was making sure that I did not talk too much and let the other two have a say once in awhile. hehe (hopefully I succeeded).

It is always great to be involved with people that are educated and striving to make the world a better place. This group is specifically focused on people management--Human Resources and Organizational Behavior etc. I felt right at home because that is where I have my passion too.

There were several questions that we all answered and then we had some specific questions based on our job experience. I had to tease the students at one point because from where I was sitting I could see a few of them nodding off--I guess it was not as entertaining as I thought! But mentioning that I saw them and laughing about it definitely caught their attention--at least for a few minutes! hehe

Lady Hiva and Lucky Dragon came to see me speak and I always love to have them with me. They seem to make me a much better person in the eyes of others. With a beautiful and intelligent wife and a smart little guy I can never go wrong!

Overall it was fun for me to hear the questions of people who are gearing up to be the leaders in the world's future and are trying to find where they best can make an impact. It is times like this that I am thankful for them and the way that the world will be in good hands.

I hope that most of all, they learn to believe in themselves, to take risks and to ask for help when they need it. Far too often we sell ourselves short of our own potential because we allow fear to control our progress. It was so much fun. I miss having opportunities to do more influential speaking...(ha! That wasn't a pompous statement at all~!) But truly it is inspiring to see the diversity and wealth of knowledge that is out there waiting to be tapped into.

Finding the GOLDEN EGG

Easter is a holiday to Celebrate Spring and the Resurrection of Jesus Christ. It is a time that we love in our family. This year was the first year to have an Easter here in the United States.

It was fun to talk about Jesus with Tau'aho and see him at least repeat back to us the lesson of the Resurrection. Although when we ask him later to tell us the story of Easter he only says, "Its about Jesus and He died." So at least we have the first half of the conversation down! hehe

We spent time with Lady Hiva's family and we did an Easter Egg hunt with all of the kids. There are hundreds of eggs in the yard. It looked more like an Easter Egg clean up, not a "hunt."  But they loved it all the same. There were several golden eggs scattered about and it was fun to watch them all try and find them. Lucky Dragon was even trying to find his own too.

Easter morning we went to church and after Lady Hiva did a small egg hunt in the house for Tau'aho. He was so excited to get a "Chickoletta" (from the cartoon Paw Patrol) that lays eggs and some tractors. He is obsessed with tractors lately. Thanks to Disney's Cars he still thinks that they "Moo" and eat hay (yellow legos) but I guess at some point he will learn that a tractor is more useful than that. He has spent all day playing with the tractors of different sized and making them all "families, with a Dustin, a Mommy and a baby."

So as we end this thankful weekend of Easter, we have so much to be thankful for. We are all healthy and happy and have a loving Savior who did, as Lucky Dragon says, die for us and was resurrected to allow us to conquer death. So happy Easter everyone! We hope yours was full of family and peace as ours.